mandyhubbard (mandyhubbard) wrote,
mandyhubbard
mandyhubbard

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One week to go. Yes, one.

The closer Prada & Prejudice's release gets, the more surreal it feels. It almost seems impossible that it could be coming out next week. Shouldn't there be an orchestra working up to a fevered pitch or something? Instead, it's just, well, quiet. Hmm. I suppose it is the calm before the storm.

So, it's not really a countdown if there's only one item on the list, but here it is:

The emotions I am feeling now:

Nervous.

Oh, there are a ton more I could add. Excited. Anxious. Elated. Estatic. But mostly, I'm just nervous. It's like the moment a surfer is gripping the edge of the board, counting down the seconds until they are going to pop up on their feet, and either sail gloriously on top of the board as the wave crests--- or promptly face plant and plough straight into the sandy bottom.

I'm nervous no one is going to buy it. or read it. or care about its existance.

I'm nervous people ARE going to read it and they're going to hate it and they're going to tell everyone else to hate it.

I'm nervous I told my local indy to order WAY too many copies for the launch and that no one will show up, and I'm nervous that everyone will show up and I'll fumble through signing and we'll sell out and I'll just have to stare at people, totally empty handed.

I'm nervous that i won't be able to find my book in stores, even though I know that many of them are planning to stock it.

I'm nervous for next week, when I'm going to walk into a bookstore and see my book for the very first time, because I think I'm going to burst into tears when I see it. But if it happens, it will be okay. It will be more than okay.

It will be perfect.
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